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Most parents don’t think their children feel lonely．If parents attentively listen to kids talking about their feelings, they may be surprised to learn just how many kids feel lonely．
A seven-year-old girl, Christa, who when asked to draw a picture of disappointment, gives an image of a friend throwing snow in her face and says that, “True friends don’t do that．I’m going to find a new true friend．” The story shows a major cause of a childhood sense of loneliness－hope for friendship．
Children also feel lonely, and even disappointed at home．Kids may complain that, “Dad is frustrated and Mom yells a lot,” or, “My dad is on the computer all the time．Dad works too much．” The kids feel lonely in this environment of parents’ stress．
If a child does something wrong because of loneliness, punishment will make her more lonely．She needs to understand why her parents couldn’t give her enough attention at that particular moment and that she wasn’t the cause of their bad feelings．So parents had better not punish children who are feeling lonely and disappointed, but try to help their children and also themselves be relaxed and comfortable．
Truly, all parents need to pay more attention to how their actions impact their friends, daughter and sisters, but the most powerful way lies in giving children like Christa the tools to feel good about herself and know that she is worthy of true friends, caring parents, and loving sisters．In your children’s lives they will not be able to control others, but they can control how they feel about themselves．Self-confidence will bring “true friends” on the present-day playground and for the rest of their lives, which is a gift that will make kids’ biggest dreams come true．
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